Relationships and Sex

The biggest areas of advice that men look for help in are actually not areas of advice that deal with contraceptives. Within the field of contraceptives, it is reasonably obvious that whether they know about contraceptives or not, men are going to keep that information to themselves and not solicit advice on the topic. That having been said however, the area of sex in general does get a lot of discussion amongst both men and women, far more than the specific area of contraceptives receives in relation to safe sex. The advice that people seek however is not about the use of contraceptives or safe sex, but rather about sex and timing. People want to know how much pressure can be put on the other partner to have sex or even when the timing might be right in order to try and initiate a sexual act. The answers to these questions are not easy, but if you start with some ground rules you should be on safe ground when it comes to having sex with your partner.
Always be Prepared
The single most important piece of advice that anyone can give you when it comes to relationships and sex is that you should always make sure that you are prepared for sex one way or another. Condoms should always be available in your house when your partner is over so that if sex does happen, you will be ready for it. If you do not have any contraceptives available and sex does happen, you run the risk of unwanted pregnancy or illness, both of which can be effective at derailing any future attempts at sex that you or your partner might attempt to initiate. For this reason, always being prepared with some contraceptives so that any sex you have is safe sex is always the best piece of advice that you can get.
Read your Partner’s Feelings
The next thing you need to do when it comes to sex is read your partner’s feelings. Regardless of whether you have contraceptives or not, the sexual act is one that needs to be wanted by both partners in order for it to be truly fulfilling. It is legitimate to a certain extent to be a little pushy when it comes to initiating sex with a partner, as there are nerves that come into play that can quickly be dispelled by actually engaging in the act of sex. That having been said however, there is a big difference between nervousness and a genuine lack of interest in having sex at that point and as a loving partner, it will be your job to ensure that you are able to understand this difference within your partner. When in doubt, err on the side of not having sex just to be safe, just as you would be purchasing and keeping condoms around just in case.
Conclusion
When it comes to relationships and sex it is always better to be safe than sorry. This is analogous to the use of contraceptives during sex as contraceptives help promote the idea of safe sex. If you keep this in mind, you’ll be fine in your sexual endeavors.

Condoms, Contraception and Women

Literally moments ago, I had an e-mail conversation with a friend who had an appointment to get birth control pills this afternoon. After having a longer than normal lunch with her husband, she lost track of time and realized she would have to reschedule her appointment with her gynecologist. Normally, for most women, this would not pose any problem, but my very good friend has had two oops moments that resulted in two precious babies born fifteen months apart because she had done exactly what she did today…miss her appointment for birth control. Birth control is one of those things that you don’t really want to mess with…ask my friend. According to recent research out of the Kinsey Institute at Indiana University, however, women see birth control as more than just a way to prevent pregnancies; the method a woman chooses to prevent pregnancy and the transmission of STDs also helps determine how pleasurable and satisfied she is sexually.
The new study reveals that many women feel that condoms actually decrease the pleasure felt from sex, but that those women who utilize both condoms and some type of hormonal contraception like birth control pills actually feel that they are more sexually satisfied. The researchers understand that the findings sound inconsistent but they believe it is an indication that women think of sex in two different arenas: sexual satisfaction (overall) and sexual enjoyment (each encounter). When women were asked about the satisfaction they felt overall about their sexual lives (which consists of how a woman feels about the relationship she is in and her sexual self-esteem), those women who utilized a hormonal birth control method combined with condoms ranked the highest in terms of being satisfied sexually. However, when these women were surveyed on how their choice on contraception (whether it was a hormonal method or condoms) affected their enjoyment of sex, those women who utilized condoms (alone or combined with alternate forms of contraception) seemed to feel that they made the sexual encounter less pleasurable. Women who simply used hormonal birth control did not feel that this type of contraception took away from their sexual enjoyment.
Those researchers who involved themselves with this study did so largely in part because the link between the contraception a woman chooses and her sexual enjoyment and satisfaction is an area that has not been studied thoroughly. Stephanie Sanders, one of the co-authors of the study, states, “The public health community has paid little attention to women's sexual experiences with contraceptive methods, especially condoms. If women think condoms detract from sexual pleasure, they may be less inclined to use them consistently." The study determined that of those women who used only a hormonal type of birth control, 4% of them felt that it decreased their sexual pleasure; these women were also the ones who felt the least sexually satisfied of the bunch. Of those women who utilized both condoms and a hormonal type of birth control, 23% of them felt it decreased their sexual pleasure; however, these women felt the most sexually satisfied of all the respondents.